Now this title may sound like a contradiction however those who know me, know it’s true. 

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Socially I can be shy and find small talk almost painful and yet get me talking about mental health and I find confidence from my lived experience.

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Labelled a chatterbox as a child I am surprised at how long it has taken me to realise what I could do with my years of lived experience of mental health issues.  The first step in sharing came in the form of this website. I realised I could create blogs that others may relate to and find comfort from.  Totally new to the world of having my own website I wrote and shared blogs and attempted to create audio versions.  I bought the gear but had no idea and realise to this day I need to tidy up those recordings. 

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The first time I was asked to share my story in particular my experience of anxiety was to an online group that empowered women to be the best version of themselves.  Truth be told I was very nervous.  I couldn’t believe that I was going to do it.  Was I mad?

The talk was well received and technology behaved itself, thank goodness!

Almost 2 years later I was approached by the local library to share some of my story as part of the Mental Health Arts Festival.  I agreed immediately.  To bring more awareness to the community has become a goal of mine so I set to writing my next talk.  The content covered various diagnoses, recovery and a short section about my book.

This would be the first time I had delivered a talk face to face with my audience.  Having heard that some talks had had no one turn up I was terrified this would be my fate too. It wasn’t I did have a small but perfectly formed group to talk to.

 

Just a few months later I was asked to speak at a Suicide Prevention and Awareness Workshop at my place of work. Held by the council, this workshop was aimed at a more corporate audience.  Attended by teachers, local fire brigade and business owners, this was a far larger audience considering the locality.

The lady leading the workshop was had a great rapport with the attendees and I almost forgot what I was there to do.

Guess what?  I didn’t faint, runaway or embarrass myself in any way.  I’ll admit I am not a seasoned speaker who knows their material by heart.  I had decided to fully script my talk so that nerves and brain fog didn’t send me off track. Sharing emotive situations can be uncomfortable but I was there as a voice of those who can’t speak up. I felt hugely privileged.  At the end I answered questions to the best of my ability and was thanked and applauded. 

As I have already said, I can  talk about my previous issues. I can share my experiences and I want to be the voice that educates and ends the needless stigma around mental health difficulties.

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If you are interested in my story, from 'Hell to Hope', please contact me at 

                                                moodsmedsandmiracles.com

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