Updated: Nov 22, 2020
Recently, on Social Media, I saw a snippet from Matt Haig's book 'Reasons to stay alive' and it got me thinking. I have read the book but it only got an OK vote from me for whatever reason.
Here is the snippet....
“THE WORLD IS increasingly designed to depress us. Happiness isn’t very good for the economy. If we were happy with what we had, why would we need more? How do you sell an anti-ageing moisturiser? You make someone worry about ageing. How do you get people to vote for a political party? You make them worry about immigration. How do you get them to buy insurance? By making them worry about everything. How do you get them to have plastic surgery? By highlighting their physical flaws. How do you get them to watch a TV show? By making them worry about missing out. How do you get them to buy a new smartphone? By making them feel like they are being left behind. To be calm becomes a kind of revolutionary act. To be happy with your own non-upgraded existence. To be comfortable with our messy, human selves, would not be good for business.” ― Matt Haig, Reasons to Stay Alive
How true is this??? I for one totally agree.
I thought I would see how affected I am by the word and the expectations we create because of it. I decided to write a report on what physical flaws I have that I would like to be changed.... here goes from head to toe:-
My hair is so fine that when I grow it long it lacks volume.
Blemishes on my face
Eyes are too small
Dark circles under my eyes
Nose is bent
Ears stick out
Boobs not so pert
Extra weight around my hips and tummy
Fat knees ......and a paarrrrtridge in a pear tree.
Right that said, do I feel good about myself? Nope! I feel inadequate as a woman due to feeling unattractive. I certainly do not look like film stars or uber fit celebrities so what can I do?
Hmmmm......I can be stricter with what I eat, work out more than three times a week, go see a plastic surgeon and have just about everything done. But is this what I want to do?
No. I don't.
I am happy to keep making small dietary changes that I am in control of and can see the genuine benefits to health and hormone balance.
So the world would have me see those things listed as flaws but does that mean I should?
Will I benefit from constantly putting myself down? Will the weight drop off? Will my little eyes suddenly widen overnight giving me beautiful large peepers? Will people love me more? Will I have the perfect life?
NO, NO, NO, NO AND OF COURSE NOT!
It is a this point that I really feel like telling the world to f**k off!
How dare it tell me what I should look like! How dare it tell me that my curvier figure is not attractive!
FYI I'd be a dress size 13 if it existed. How dare it create so much self-doubt in people that they self-harm or worse still take their own lives! How bloody dare it!
So I am going to do something positive about that list I wrote and this is what it should look like :-
I have naturally smooth and shiny hair
I have deep brown eyes that never lie
The skin on my face is soft and healthy
I have beautiful curves that show my femininity and the fact that I was blessed with the ability to give birth.
I am blessed to have enough to eat and to chose what I feed my body.
I have an appetite.......this is a big one for me for their have been times in my life when eating felt impossible. I had no desire to eat at all. My appetite was gone for months and I was skin and bone.
I have boobs:-)
My dinky ears keep my glasses on lol
There you go. That is my positive 2 fingered salute to the world and it's criticism.
Find me the person who decided that only flawless skin is beautiful and acceptable because I would happily get in their face about how shallow and superficial this point of view is!
Just how many products are our we told to put on our faces?
Cleanse, tone, moisturise, primer, foundation, concealer, contouring, eyebrows......lol don't get me started on eyebrows.lol.
All these products have goodness knows what kinda crap in them and all because we want to look older or younger.......crazy!
The world is full of beautiful young people and because of this world our young people don't feel good enough. Always looking to fill this or stretch that.
I'm not against making the best of oneself but I am against the world making people focus on their flaws and judging themselves for it.!!!!
I would love to hear how you view your flaws and whether you love yourself any less for them?